We all know that feeling – we desperately want to create a different outcome in life but keep sabotaging ourselves back to our comfort zone by not taking the necessary steps forward.

I often refer to this powerful quote: ‘Self-sabotage is the overprotective mind keeping us stuck in the familiar and comfortable past.’

Unfortunately, our default system is set to return to the familiar and comfortable past, but as we all know, nothing different happens there.  

For many of us, self-sabotage is a sneaky little sucker that takes us away from what we truly want to create. It is often disguised as procrastination, self-doubt, or negative self-talk.

I believe we can overcome these patterns, but it requires mastering our minds by moving beyond our past limitations.

Let’s look at the 3 Steps you can take to release patterns of self-sabotage for good!

STEP 1. Recognise the Patterns

The first step in mastering your mind is identifying when and how you sabotage yourself. Common signs include:

  • Procrastination: Delaying tasks despite their importance.
  • Negative Self-Talk: Internal dialogues that undermine your confidence.
  • Perfectionism: Setting unattainably high standards and feeling paralysed by the fear of not meeting them.
  • Fear of Failure: Avoiding challenges to escape the possibility of failing.

Take a moment to reflect on which of these patterns is most dominant in your life.

STEP 2. Challenge Negative Thoughts

Once you recognise these patterns, the next step is to challenge and reframe negative thoughts. You can follow this process below:

* Identifying Negative Thoughts: Write them down to make them tangible.

Example: What’s the point of trying to start another exercise routine this week? I am probably going to fail anyway.

* Evaluating Evidence: Look for evidence that contradicts these thoughts.


  • Before COVID, I had a great daily exercise routine.
  • While I was at Uni, I was training for a half-marathon and completed it.
  • Only 12 months ago, I nearly got back into my groove, but I injured my calf.

* Reframing: Replace negative thoughts with more realistic, positive ones.


  • I believe in my capacity to create a long-term exercise routine.
  • I choose to ask for help so that I feel empowered to create a long-term exercise routine.
  • I now commit 100%, even when it’s feeling challenging. I believe in ME.

STEP 3. Set Realistic Goals

The next step is to set clear, achievable goals. This will prevent the paralysis of perfectionism.

You can break down large goals into smaller, manageable tasks so that your goals are achievable. This makes progress feel attainable and reduces overwhelm.

Define your objectives using the SMART criteria: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-bound.

These 3 steps should release patterns of self-sabotage.

So what’s next?

Remember that who you surround yourself with impacts your choices and reinforces your efforts to master your mind. Seek support from friends, family, or mentors who encourage and believe in you. Professional help from a program or coach can sometimes provide valuable strategies and insights.

Mastering your mind to prevent self-sabotage is a journey that requires self-awareness, intentional practice, and persistence. By recognising self-sabotaging patterns, challenging negative thoughts, setting realistic goals, embracing a growth mindset, practising mindfulness, seeking support, and taking action, you can transform your mental landscape and pave the way for success.

If you want further support, then please book a FREE 30-minute Empower and Transform Breakthrough Session with me